The Art of Letting Go

A few months ago, a guy asked me out. I don't really date - but decided to give it a shot. Worst case scenario, I'd get some sweet potato fries and a 90 Shilling Lager out of the deal. The date came, and the date went, and it was surprisingly good. He seemed to do everything right, we had laughs, ice cream, all the cringe-worthy gooey-eyed junk of Rom Coms, and then - poof - he became the dreaded Denver douche - the 20 something that is "too busy" for a relationship. The conflicted, confused child that all of the actual bonafide women (not girls) in the dating pool hate - the one that leads us on and acts like they want to be our boyfriend, and even though we haven't even decided if that's what we want, backs off before it flourishes into a real relationship.

Ugh.

Yep - I was pissed. I created a cloud of obscenities over the Highland Tap House over brews with my girlfriends that is probably still hanging in space (yes I stole that from A Christmas Story.) How had I been duped? That son-of-a....where is my tire slashing IKEA knife?!? That good. FOR. NOTHING. ASSHOLE!

AND THEN! THEN! I hauled my ass to the nearest yoga studio - rolled out my crusty mat, got into downward facing dog, breathed in through my nose, and exhaled a deep, goose bump inducing breath - and let it all go. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh lion's breath. Gone.

Well, maybe not quite, but I was on the way. I also did super shitty on a stats test that week. And I got a massive bill from the Urgent Care team regarding my finger that, in the end, is going to fall off anyway. But I have to let it go, because like the black tissue on my finger, holding onto something ugly that has passed just leaves you with a rancid looking scab.

There is a beauty in letting go. It's hard - because for those of us who are passionate, it can feel like the ugly stepsister to Giving Up. But letting go is not giving up. Letting go is the opposite of resistance. Where resistance exists, pain exists. Sometimes resistance is good, it's beneficial. But if it's ship that's already sailed - a romantic relationship that has seen it's time, a bad test score, a horrible day, an astronomically high parking ticket, a terrible comment a co worker made - holding onto that is just going to create a Grinchy tension in your body, and that just doesn't feel good. And I'm not talking about the type of "letting go" that involves a secret stash of whatever the problem is in your pocket just in case. I mean releasing that shit.

Let it go. All of it, whatever it is. People aren't going to walk all over you; you've taken control. Control of your thoughts, of the mind, of the heart, of (in my case) that passion that can easily turn into a forest fire if ignited. Let it go and make room for something more wholesome and nurturing. A white knuckled roller coaster ride is no way to glide through life.

Breathe in, breathe out, let it go.